By Joy Gjersvold
I made a public declaration around my 40th birthday. I posted on my favorite social media page that I was refusing to color my gray hair. It started a bit of a debate about why we each do, or do not, color when those gray hairs appear. Several of my friends thought I was joking. Some are sure that I will cave because it will make me crazy and I will feel like I am aging before my time. I must admit that some of the responses to my declaration felt hurtful and snide. Truthfully, the strawberry blonde kicked in and I felt a bit like saying, “Challenge accepted.” What I didn’t know was that my 40th Birthday Declaration would be the beginning of my journey toward becoming a proud, full-fledged tinsel lovin’ yaya. 
I have thought a lot lately about our culture and the media’s campaign to make women feel as though they should constantly be chasing the ultimate body type, hair color, wardrobe, and self-image. I think the reason this has become so important to me is that I am learning as I get older the value of living as the most authentic version of myself, and I am very aware that how I approach womanhood and getting older reflects on my daughter’s opinion of herself. Turning 40, or any age for that matter, and turning gray doesn’t mean the end is near, it means the start of something new. So why would I spend money—that I’d much rather spend on coffee with my closest friends—living into the belief that going gray means I am old or fading? My son tells me all the time that when he looks at me he doesn’t see me getting older. He says I’m getting better. Whether he is looking to bank points with Mom or not, it’s his truth. I’m learning what is truly important about “getting old” and it’s not the old part. It’s the experience and truly having the chance to see how my attitude and experiences impact others. And you know what? There are other women out there who feel the same way! 
Being proud of my tinsely, silver strands has brought about a bit of a club, a group of amazing women that I am very proud to call my yayas. They too are fully embracing their gray hair and living to show the world that older, “gray-haired” women have fathoms of experience to share and delightful stories to tell. They consciously choose not to buy into our society’s view that youth is more valuable than being true to yourself and they have dedicated themselves to living by example to empower other women to feel the same way. They are some of the most graceful, eloquent, and inspiring women I know. They encourage me and strengthen my spirit. They feed my soul and fill my cup. Their joy and laughter, their priceless insight and struggles, their triumphs and celebrations—all make me a better woman. My tinsel lovin’ yayas have always seen the true Joy and they have helped me to love myself and to share the best of me with the world. Most importantly, they’ve encouraged me to be proud of getting older. And I love every single minute of it. One of the most valuable lessons I have learned is that age truly is just a number. When I look in the mirror I don’t see elderly and fading. I see silver and I see experience. I see rewards and I see blessings. My tinsel tells the story of my time here on earth, the lessons I’ve learned, the journeys I’ve taken, my faith, and the belief that I am truly making a difference in this world. I have earned every single strand. I admit, I sometimes hear the commercials and see the ads that encourage me to look younger and I imagine for a moment forever being a strawberry blonde. And then I remember, living fully, my experiences—some good, some bad—have earned me the honor of a silver crown and I am reminded of the words my mother has spoken so many times, “Grow old gracefully.”
